|Great quote and a good link to more recovery stuff here.|
So, a decent enough week. There I said it, HA! A decent enough week with no booze. Who'd have thought that I'd confess that. OK, so its been busy but I've ramped a lot of 'doesn't need doing' right back. We have also talked about hiring a cleaner because lets face it, even faced with rain, I was out digging my garden rather than hoover yesterday. So things are settling a bit.
I read this and it made some sense/;
The message is: believe that you can, before believing that you can’t and you may find yourself farther along on your way toward the life you want to lead, rather than someone who focuses on the obstacles, justifying to themselves why they cannot do certain things. Link on the van above.
At our SMART meeting this week, there was a bit of chat about the fact that other drugs aren't on the shelves of the supermarket or featured to heavily in everyday 'normal' life the way booze was. Its everywhere that booze baddie.
I went to a cafe (sober treat) whilst waiting for my son doing his driving theory test a day or so ago and in this quirky little cafe I counted 4 different everyday items (some cakes) and oddly enough a sandwich with booze. It was a BLT, which they'd renamed a BMBLT (Bloody Mary Bacon Lettuce Tomato). I had to read it a few times, seems they roast the tomatoes after they douse them in vodka. OK so this might be a bit of a 'cheffy' thing to do, but really wouldn't olive oil impart a nice flavour too?
So, two vodka baked tomatoes aren't going to throw me off kilter but my point is really that booze shouldn't really be in my sandwich, nor my cake, nor my cheesecake thank you. I had the pate instead and delish it was. Even my local fish and chip shop has wine/beer in the fridge next to the salt and sauce. Seriously, its a chippy, a very nice chippy with sit down tables if you like, but its a chippy, what's with the Pinot? Before I would have lapped with us, literally. Look its OK to have wine with my chips, I mean, they sell it!! Now I just think its sad and sometimes a bit triggery.
Watching TV is a minefield, its all booze on the soaps and a lot of booze in mainstream TV. I mean Penny in Big Bang, whilst I use to love to watch her drinking wine from a gravy boat and think HA I'm not that bad, looking at it now I see one lady with a lot of booze and her friends around her trying to sometimes fit in with her 'normal'. She's a drinker that's for sure.
We eat out a lot in our house, that 'one' glass before dinner is often my downfall and it was on my birthday (THANK YOU WOLFIE YOU B*****RD). The first thing I do now is scan a menu for alcohol free versions or mocktails, nice juices and drinks. I'm often quite disappointed to see limited or no choices. A few places are starting to advertise the fact that with the change in our law they offer alternative drinks, which is heartening.
Whilst I use to immerse myself in the 'everyone drinks' culture of life, when you realise that not everyone drinks, they pop up all over the place, like sober superstars. Its a bit like a sub-culture emerging quietly in the background of life. Has it always been there? Almost certainly, I just had my booze goggles on.
Oh now I was going to tell you about my meeting. We did a fair bit of work on the attitudes of others towards our drinking. (Which can suck, lets be fair, as booze is everywhere and accepted as drug of choice right now). And, how regardless of how we feel, how much we keep things private, we don't make long-term changes in a vacuum. And change, like stopping drinking, can cause anxiety, which is OK, just be aware it might be there rather than surprise when it bites you on the arse to say hello. We also need to be aware that that anxiety can also manefest itself in our friends or family. They might see our choices as a reflection on theirs. A bit like my chum, feeling like I was poking her with a stick when I said no gin in my tonic. I wasn't actually thinking about how she was feeling, just about me and getting through a drink offer. My not drinking isn't a reflection on anyone else, but I am beginning to realise, whilst I'm doing it quietly, this stopping lark, it does quietly affect other parts of my life and sometimes, my friends.
There's a link to a paper here, I'm not sure what I think about it, some bits were useful for me to think about, others I didn't get along with. It talked about 'togetherness' which always reminds me of that silly advert.
I do waffle on, so thank you for getting this far! If you've something kind or helpful to add or just want to say hello. Please drop a line below. I'd appreciate that. Thank you.