Monday, 22 December 2014

Day 78 - Festive planning.

Hey its Monday. Hope that's going well for you. So last night we took the bull by the horns and got some of the festive decks out. I like to think that even with 8 people here over the next week, I'm going to keep my sober cool. 

Remind me I said that.

I've my bestest booziest friend coming to stay, well one of them, I have a few. And, its going to be difficult she's also bringing her entire family with her, including another big time boozer. I've primed her to know that I'm not drinking right now. I have my own reasons and I've shared as much as I'm comfy with.  I'm not really very comfortable with drink being here, but I got told in no uncertain terms, we have to drink when we're here. We can't not drink (the we is the visitors not me). Yes, I could have cancelled. But like so many things this has been arranged BS (before sober) and whilst I am nervous, I'd feel even shittier if we cancelled. We've all had a lot of family stuff go on this year, a lot of changes and despite the plonk, I'd really not like to let them/us down. So whilst I feel like a shit friend for not wanting anyone in particular to be here, I've not cancelled and that's my responsibility.

Remind me I said that.

So in with the festive planning I've done a shed load of shopping for so many different types of posh juice. We've even corked fizzy apple for the table on Xmas day. So my sober slurping is sorted out. I've got wee can's of mocktails (I know I can make them, but this is first aid mocktails) for when the witching hour strikes and we decide its time for a wee slurp. I've no-alochol wine (rose) as well. Some might think this is cheating, but, I don't its quite nice and the two drinkers are on red or white, so there's not a cats chance in hell that this stuff will get muddled up. I chose pink for a reason. We've also lots of treats and nibbles in, lots of nuts and bits and bobs. And if all else fails I'll gorge on rice cakes. They fill me up nicely like a bean bag.

I know that being sober means I can escape the madness in the car and there's no limit to that. I can walk the dogs after meals, before meals or just sit in the car at the end of the lane with a mars bar and the radio on. I can escape, but living in the middle of nowhere means I need to be sober to do this. So being sober and my sober car, is important to keep safe for escaping. I mean where would batman be without the bat mobile.

We've also two kids coming of teenage years, so I've looked out a shed load of dvd's, games and the Wii so we can have a bit of a giggle whilst the adults get sloshed. I've also created a few sitting spots around the house. I've not bought one bottle of wine, and I'm determined I wont. I've told them to bring their own, not very festive of me but quite honestly I don't care. I've spent all my money on juice, flowers and bubble bath. I'm determined not to get stressed. As essentially xmas dinner is a roast dinner with presents, what's to stress about that (aside the people)?

With 8 bodies in this wee cottage a bit of planning has been required. Initially I was going to put us on a sofa bed nearest the kitchen, but having had a good virtual sober slap from Belle, I'm keeping my bedroom. I need a calm cosy sanctuary, a sober cave to run to. And here's where I need your help. I've upped the treats and the sober slurps in the kitchen. What do I need in my sober cave?

So far I've replenshed the flowers with a huge bunch of lilies from my son. I've got the bedding ready, my favourite and my favourite cover. I'm hiding my favourite towel in here. I think I might blow a gasket if I see my friends dad all fluffed up and wearing my sober towel. So that's in here too. I've a couple magazines, my phone charger, my ipad and charger. I was going to download a kindle app and put some books on there I've been wanting to read like Mrs D goes without. I've rescue remedy if needed, I've bubble bath for escape baths, we do have a spare telly I might bring that through although I hate tv's in bedrooms. I've even downloaded an app which lets me text from the house, as we've no signal here. So a sober text can even save the day. I'm keeping Living Sober and sober blogs loaded and will listen to Belle's sober podcasts. Hmmm,

What else could I need in my sober cave? Any clues? 

Escape tools - car keys, dogs for walking, books, podcasts, baths, bed, magazines, quiet sober cave, sober slurpy juice, mocktails, rescue remedy, ipad, kindle, sober pals to text or call.

What's in your sober arsenal over xmas? Please do let me know. Whilst I'm on Day 80 tomorrow, Day 83 on xmas day, I'm really dreading this. I know I could have cancelled but even if I did we'd likely have ended up doing something with someone else out of my control. Better the devil you know, eh?


  1. Hi Daisy, You are as prepared as any girl scout I know:)
    I think you are all set. The only thing I might add to your sober cave are photos of the kids. But I bet you already have them:). Congrats on your sober days. I am day 63. We are doing it!! KT

  2. Hi KT, I'm right with you on day 65! Yes I'd say it sounds like you are quite prepared. Have you read Sober is the New Black? That's a GREAT book. Mrs. D's book was great too. Maybe you need chocolate in there? Meditation podcasts and the Bubble Hour? I've not tried the non alcoholic beer and wine yet but was thinking about that for myself this week too. Good luck, I'll be thinking of you

    1. Do far there's been limited book time but great call as I'd chocolate! X

  3. Daisy, I'm sending big strong sober hugs to your side of the world :). To be preparing for something you're dreading has to be rough. I think the only thing I'd add to my arsenal, if I were you, would be your "NO"/"ON" fragment you found on the beach. Hold to it tightly! Thinking of you...Lori K xx

  4. Hi Daisy
    Well done. You should be very proud of how far you've come. Your posts have been an inspiration to me over the last few months, as I had two brilliant sober months followed by a relapse after the shock of the sudden and unexpected illness and loss of my mum who I adored. I hadn't been sober long enough to build up alternative support mechanisms, so relapsed big time to numb the pain. But it doesn't really and I wish I was facing a sober Christmas like you, which for us will be terribly sad with or without alcohol! I will try again soon. Best wishes Sarah

  5. I hope things are going well! You are a well prepared hostess!
    Merry Christmas.